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I sat on the stool, praying to a God that I didn’t know if he would listen to me. Bella was sedated, but all I wanted was to see her gorgeous, espresso-colored eyes. I wanted to hear her beautiful voice, see her smile, hold her in my arms. I had to settle for holding her hand and watching her, seeing her chest rise and fall with each mechanical breath of the ventilator.

“Edward, the police are here,” said Sheri from the doorway. “They need to speak with you.”

“I don’t want to leave her,” I whispered.

“It won’t take long, Edward,” Sheri murmured, putting her hand on my shoulder. I jumped, uncomfortable with her touch. She quickly recoiled. “I’m sorry. Carlisle mentioned that you were injured.”

“It’s okay,” replied. “I just don’t like to be touched.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. I am very sorry for startling you,” she said sincerely. “I’ll stay next to her, keep her company.”

“Okay,” I sighed. I got up, stumbling a little bit since I was hungry and exhausted. I gave one longing look at my Bella. I bent down, kissing her temple. “I love you, bellisima. I’ll be back soon.” I ran my fingers down her cheek and left the room. Walking out into the waiting room, I saw Carlisle speaking to Agent Dean and Emmett. Rose was still gone, presumably still sleeping in the hotel room she mentioned. “The nurse, Sheri, said you needed to speak with me? Is Esme in custody?”

“She is. She had a flesh wound and was cared for at Forks Hospital. Agent Williamson and Chief Black are holding her in the Forks Police Department,” Agent Dean explained.

“What do you need from me?” I asked.

“Esme has completely gone off the rails,” Emmett growled. “She’s muttering in Portuguese and kept repeating a word, ‘Eleazar.’ Does that mean anything to you?”

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“Bella, please!” I sobbed, pressing my hands harder on her chest, trying to stop the bleeding. Chief Black ran in with Emmett, holding a med kit. “She just passed out. We have to save her!” Her pale skin was turning a sickly grey. She was losing too much blood.

“Son, you need to step back,” Chief Black said softly. “We’ll take care of your girl.” He slid his hand under my hand and kept the pressure on it while Emmett cut open Bella’s shirt. I fell back, leaning against the cot my mom was resting on, tears running down my cheeks as my reason for living lay bleeding out on the floor of this God-forsaken cabin.

“My sweet boy, don’t cry,” Mom whispered, her fingers running through my hair. “She is an angel and will be alright.”

“How do you know?” I asked, turning to look at her. “Mom, she saved me. Saved us.”

“That’s why she’ll be okay,” Mom said, cupping my cheek. Her eyes were bright and clear; just like I’d remembered as a child before my father’s death. “It’s always darkest before dawn, my sweet child. I’m sorry that I was gone for so long.”

“Mom?” I questioned, blinking at her. She looked like the woman that I remembered growing up. She smiled crookedly, reaching for me and enveloping me into an awkward hug. I clung to her, apologizing for my stupidity. She didn’t say anything, just held me as I lost it all.

“Edward, we’ve got to go,” Carlisle said. I turned and looked up at him. Behind him, Sam and Agent Dean were standing with a gurney chair for my mom. “Bella needs immediate surgery. We’re driving back to the station and then taking the helicopter to Port Angeles.”

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I knew when Bella came into her bedroom. I felt my body relax. Clinging to her, I managed to fall into a deep sleep. I stayed that way until I heard a crash in the suite. I sat up, woozy and confused. Looking around, I saw that Bella was gone and that it was almost noon. I got out of bed, stumbling over my own feet as I made my way to the living room. Carlisle was pacing and his ice-blue eyes were blazing with anger. From what I gathered, he’d also just gotten up.

“Emmett, she did the exact opposite of what you told her to do!” Carlisle screamed, his hands clenched. “I woke up to a note from Bella saying that she had to ‘run errands’ and she’d be back in a few hours. I don’t know when she deposited that note, but it’s almost noon!”

I couldn’t hear anything from Emmett’s response, but I sat down on the couch, trying to keep my anxiety at bay. Bella was off doing something that probably had to do with Esme and rescuing my mom. She was going to get hurt, or worse … KILLED! “I’ve got to go, Emmett. Edward’s awake and he’s as white as a sheet,” Carlisle said, tossing the phone onto the table and limping to me. “Edward, how much did you hear?”

“Bella’s gone,” I whispered. “And you don’t know when she left.”

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I don’t remember the ride back to the hotel. Carlisle had given me one of my anti-anxiety pills and a pain pill. I was numb, for which I was eternally grateful. I needed numb. The constant pain from my injuries and now my broken heart from Esme taking my mom, it was too much. I also felt badly for yelling at Bella. The pain in her eyes was almost too much to bear as I blamed her for everything.

She didn’t deserve my anger. If anything, I was the one to blame. It was my fault that the two women I loved were in this position. Bella was in danger because of Esme and was a walking target. My mom was an innocent bystander and would probably be killed because of Esme’s maliciousness. If that happened, I don’t know what I’d do.

Death sounds like a good option.

I shook off Esme’s evil voice from my mind, encouraging me to end it all. I couldn’t. I had to stay strong, though I didn’t have any strength left. I was so done.

“Edward, do you want anything to eat?” Bella asked, her voice quiet and her actions hesitant.

“I’m not hungry,” I whispered. “Just tired.”

“I can imagine,” she said, reaching for my hand. I let her take it, but I felt guilty accepting any sort of comfort from her. My mom was suffering because of me. I didn’t deserve anything that Bella was giving me. Her generosity, her kindness, her love … I truly was worthless. “Edward, I can see the hamster working in your head. Don’t go there.”

“Why not?” I asked, taking my hand back. “My mom is in this position because of me. It’s my fault! Everything is my fault!”

“It’s not, Edward,” she said, her tiny hands taking my face. 

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I dragged my exhausted, battered body up to Esme’s condo. I had just returned from a brutal date with one of her most sadistic clients, Victoria, and her husband, James. I never thought I’d consider Esme to be a lightweight, but after the four hours I’d spent with them, I yearned for Esme’s whips. I collapsed on my bed, laying on my stomach so my back, which was littered with torn and ripped skin, would not come in contact with the sheets.

Every day, I prayed for death.

I couldn’t keep doing this. I just couldn’t. The constant feeling of pain, no sleep, no food and the hanging threat of Felix’s promise of raping me – it was too much. I wanted to die.

“Hmmm, I may have to talk to Victoria and James about causing so much damage to my prize stallion,” Esme tutted, walking into my room.

“Please, mistress,” I cried. “I can’t.”

“I know, pet,” she said, taking out a fluffy towel and gently patting down my aching, scarred back. “I may be a sadist, but making you service me while you’re bleeding like this. That’s just cruel.” She washed my wounds, acting somewhat tender. “I got a phone call today, pet.”

“You did?” I whispered, waiting for the pain to come. Not that I could feel it. I was beyond numb.

“I did. A new client that specifically requested you,” she purred. “I told her that you were a specialty item that you only catered to clients with specific tastes. I asked for proof.”

Oh, God. What is she going to make me do now?

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I dragged my exhausted, battered body up to Esme’s condo. I had just returned from a brutal date with one of her most sadistic clients, Victoria, and her husband, James. I never thought I’d consider Esme to be a lightweight, but after the four hours I’d spent with them, I yearned for Esme’s whips. I collapsed on my bed, laying on my stomach so my back, which was littered with torn and ripped skin, would not come in contact with the sheets.

Every day, I prayed for death.

I couldn’t keep doing this. I just couldn’t. The constant feeling of pain, no sleep, no food and the hanging threat of Felix’s promise of raping me – it was too much. I wanted to die.

“Hmmm, I may have to talk to Victoria and James about causing so much damage to my prize stallion,” Esme tutted, walking into my room.

“Please, mistress,” I cried. “I can’t.”

“I know, pet,” she said, taking out a fluffy towel and gently patting down my aching, scarred back. “I may be a sadist, but making you service me while you’re bleeding like this. That’s just cruel.” She washed my wounds, acting somewhat tender. “I got a phone call today, pet.”

“You did?” I whispered, waiting for the pain to come. Not that I could feel it. I was beyond numb.

“I did. A new client that specifically requested you,” she purred. “I told her that you were a specialty 

item that you only catered to clients with specific tastes. I asked for proof.”

Oh, God. What is she going to make me do now?

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“Bella, there’s a phone call for you on line two,” said Jessica, standing by the entrance to my office. “It’s a man. Jared?”

“Thank you, Jess,” I said. “Can you please close the door?” She nodded and left me to take the phone call. I’d been searching for Jared since my ‘date’ with Edward that happened a week ago. I was concerned about him since Felix was now Edward’s driver. Blowing out a breath, I picked up the phone. “Jared?”

“Miss Bella,” he whispered. He sounded older, more haggard. “I’m sorry I haven’t called you back. I was, um, unavailable …”

“You lie for shit, Jared,” I said. “Where are you?”

“I’m at home,” he replied. “I had an accident.”

“I’m coming to you, Jared,” I murmured.

“Don’t! I’m afraid that I’m being watched, Miss Bella,” Jared said.

“Then, let me send a car for you,” I pushed. “I’m certain you’re calling for the same reason why I was trying to contact you.”

“Very well,” he sighed.

He gave me his address and I contacted Carlisle, asking him to pick up Jared. I worked, not really paying attention to what I was doing. An hour later, Carlisle came into my office with a bruised and battered Jared. I stood up, my eyes wide and scampered to him. “What happened to you?” I asked, helping him to the couch.

“Something happened to my limo. When the police investigated, it appeared that my brake lines were cut,” Jared said. “I was lucky. It could have been a lot worse.”

Jared

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“He won’t wake up, Esme,” came the fuzzy voice of Felix. He kicked my back, causing me to groan. “Why won’t he wake up?”

“We’ve been working him over for the past eight weeks. His body must have just given out,” Esme cooed.

“But, I wanted to fuck him until he bled,” Felix snarled.

“Felix, that’s too much, too far,” Esme snapped. “Because of your insolence, you lost your privilege to claim his ass. Besides, I’d rather he enjoy it. Now, he’s running a fever and delirious. Go get Dr. Gerandy. He can help us out.”

“So, no playtime with Edward?” Felix asked.

“Nope. I’d rather my victims be coherent and active participants,” Esme snickered, sitting on my bed and wiping brow with a damp cloth. I shifted, trying to get away from her. But, I was weak and sore and so tired. “Are you still here? Go!”

“Fine,” Felix snapped, stomping out of my room.

“It was a matter of time before you fell apart, Edward,” Esme said, her voice sickeningly sweet. Her hand threaded in my hair, pulling it harshly. “You are so pitiful. You know that this illness will be added to your bill. If you keep this up, you’ll never be able to pay me back, Edward.”

I opened my eyes. Esme was blurry and every part of my body was in excruciating pain. “I know that I will owe you, but please. Give me some time to heal, Mistress.”

She pursed her lips, getting up from her perch on my bed. “I shouldn’t be so accommodating, Edward. However, like I said before, I prefer my victims to be coherent and active participants,” she said. With a scowl, she left and came back with a bottle of water and some Advil. “You have two days to get better, Edward. Dr. Gerandy will see to all of your needs.” She got up, leaving me in my room. I collapsed against the bed and closed my eyes again. 

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Today's my birthday, but you guys are getting the presents: an early update for Buying Love.

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My eyes were trained on the shattered man in front of me. He was on the ground, chanting quietly numerous apologies and pleas for forgiveness. Tears were flowing down his cheeks and he seemed so lost. Rose came in when she heard the slap.

“Fuck me,” she squeaked. “What the hell happened?”

“We were fighting. I kissed him and he wiped his mouth like he was disgusted with me. I slapped him and he fell to his knees, chanting numerous apologies,” I said, feeling incredibly guilty for cause this whatever this is.

“Esme fucked him up, Bells,” Rose murmured, squeezing my hand. I looked down at him, my heart breaking into a million pieces. “You need to get through to him, sweetie.”

“How?” I choked out.

“Love him,” Rose replied, kissing my temple. “I’ll call Carlisle and see if he can help us.”

She left us, walking to the kitchen. I sat down on the floor, staring at the broken, wrecked man in front of me. “Edward, can you hear me?”

“I’m so sorry. So sorry. Please don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt my mother,” he whispered, tears flowing down his pale cheeks. “I’ll do anything. Please … please!”

I inched closer to him, placing my hand on his knee. He jumped, pushing back and pressing his body against the wall. “Edward, I’m sorry. I won’t hurt you. Please come back.”

He curled up, hugging his legs. His face was pinched in pain. It looked like he was trying to make himself invisible. “Don’t hurt her. I’ll do anything you want. I promise. Just don’t hurt my mom. She’s all I have to live for. Please!”

“No, Edward, don’t say that,” I sobbed, taking his hand. He clenched his hand into a fist, refusing to move it, but gently I pried it away from his leg, seeing angry awful welts on his wrists. His cuffs were gone and I bit back vomit seeing the damage on his pale skin. “Edward, baby, please, come back to me.”

He hit his head against the wall. “I tried to be a good son. I tried and I failed. I don’t deserve anything good,” he said, taking his hand back and burying his face into his knees.

“You are a good son, Edward,” I whispered. “You are a good man.”

“No, I’m not,” he said, looking up. His eyes were empty, dead. 

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“I don’t know everything, but I know enough, Edward,” I snapped back. “I know your secret.”

EPOV

Rose had backed out of the room and it was just me and Bella. Seeing her, it made my dead heart sputter back to life, but I was never going to see her again after today. Esme threatened my mother that if I saw Bella, regardless of the cost to her company, my mom would pay the ultimate price. I couldn’t let that happen.

That didn’t even come close to the physical, bodily harm she threatened to me. Even worse than what I’m feeling now.

My body was aching and sore. I was swimming in my clothes. My stomach was snarling from the lack of food. I hadn’t had a proper meal since my time in Napa. Esme was withholding food from me if called out in pain during my nightly round of torture. I was a broken man and I couldn’t let Bella see me like this. I had to break her heart and ultimately shatter mine so I could save my mother. She stared at me, her eyes swirling with anger, determination and something else. With great difficulty, I stood as tall as I could, feeling every bit of pain that Esme and Felix inflicted on me and glared at her. “You know nothing,” I snarled. “You couldn’t even fathom what I have to fucking deal with, Ms. Swan. I let my heart get involved and I was weak.”

“Like you are now?” she sneered. “I see what she’s done to you! What she’s doing to your mother!”